Here I am, once again confronting the serendipity of life, the consequences of the unexpected turn of events and the process of patiently waiting in ‘deep time’ for things to be revealed. For me, deep time is an inward place that feels very present and equally liminal in nature. Art museums often define a revelatory landscape in this manner; “ Revelatory landscape designs expose and interpret what exists, rather than obscuring the real conditions of the land with imposed design.” A rather pertinent expression of what I am experiencing.
It is challenging to be in this place of unknowing. It is tempting to seek comfort in familiar,inherited religious and cultural systems. Instead, I endeavor to see/hold reality in a new light, a new way, breaking through traditional religious and cultural systems into new revelatory landscape that integrates and transforms the quality of my humanness and restores me to the heart of creation where I intuitively belong.
My spiritual life moves through a time of un-learning of the ways I have been schooled. Here I linger, inwardly healing and trusting that I may emerge with a new self-understanding and vision of the sacred. I am unsettled and my equilibrium disturbed as I let go of previous patriarchal teachings and move toward a new way of being. A commitment to seek G*d is embedded in my heart, embodied in me in Love. I am invited to enter a dynamic dance of knowing and be-ing that is beyond thought and ordinary consciousness – a landscape of freedom and authenticity
Living Mystery ignites my soul, drawing me forward to a deeper experience of the sacred that is connected to but outside my church life. I wait as it reveals a new path of being religious. This is a profoundly serious faith experience compelling me to be a channel of presence; one that holds sacred, reveres, and protects the diversity and beauty of creation. I am inspired to honor the circle of belonging by living my life in harmony with mercy and justice. I am gently invited to touch my own soul’s capacity to heal the exclusion, cruelty and rejection of difference around otherness that I harbor in my own heart as the place where I begin.
And so I pray that I may move deeper into an understanding of peace as the essence of heart discovered through a unitive state of being. I pray that I may have faith and ‘trust in the enduring intimacy’ of what I will know as my heart becomes more intimately anchored in the divine heart.